As Drunk as a Wheel-Barrow – Benjamin Franklin

On the day of  Benjamin Franklin’s birthday here is an article he wrote for the The Pennsylvania Gazette published on January 13, 1736/7. However Ben’s list of 200+ synonyms for drunkenness was beaten by Paul Dickson, who’s book Drunk: The Definitive Drinker’s Dictionary, broke the Guinness record with 2,231 synonyms.

Benjamin Franklin

Benjamin Franklin

The Drinker’s Dictionary

Nothing more like a Fool than a drunken Man.
Poor Richard.

‘Tis an old Remark, that Vice always endeavours to assume the Appearance of Virtue: Thus Covetousness calls itself Prudence; Prodigality would be thought Generosity; and so of others. This perhaps arises hence, that Mankind naturally and universally approve Virtue in their Hearts, and detest Vice; and therefore, whenever thro’ Temptation they fall into a Practice of the latter, they would if possible conceal it from themselves as well as others, under some other Name than that which properly belongs to it.

But DRUNKENNESS is a very unfortunate Vice in this respect. It bears no kind of Similitude with any sort of Virtue, from which it might possibly borrow a Name; and is therefore reduc’d to the wretched Necessity of being express’d by distant round-about Phrases, and of perpetually varying those Phrases, as often as they come to be well understood to signify plainly that A MAN IS DRUNK.

Tho’ every one may possibly recollect a Dozen at least of the Expressions us’d on this Occasion, yet I think no one who has not much frequented Taverns would imagine the number of them so great as it really is. It may therefore surprize as well as divert the sober Reader, to have the Sight of a new Piece, lately communicated to me, entitled


He is Addled,
He’s casting up his Accounts,
He’s Afflicted,
He’s in his Airs.

He’s Biggy,
Block and Block,
Been at Barbadoes,
Piss’d in the Brook,
Drunk as a Wheel-Barrow,
Has Stole a Manchet out of the Brewer’s Basket,
His Head is full of Bees,
Has been in the Bibbing Plot,
Has drank more than he has bled,
He’s Bungey,
As Drunk as a Beggar,
He sees the Bears,
He’s kiss’d black Betty,
He’s had a Thump over the Head with Sampson’s Jawbone,
He’s Bridgey.

He’s Cat,
Cherry Merry,
Wamble Crop’d,
Half Way to Concord,
Has taken a Chirriping-Glass,
Got Corns in his Head,
A Cup to much,
He’s heat his Copper,
He’s Crocus,
He cuts his Capers,
He’s been in the Cellar,
He’s in his Cups,
Non Compos,
Loaded his Cart,
He’s been too free with the Creature,
Sir Richard has taken off his Considering Cap,
He’s Chap-fallen,

He’s Disguiz’d,
He’s got a Dish,
Kill’d his Dog,
Took his Drops,
It is a Dark Day with him,
He’s a Dead Man,
Has Dipp’d his Bill,
He’s Dagg’d,
He’s seen the Devil,

He’s Prince Eugene,
Wet both Eyes,
Cock Ey’d,
Got the Pole Evil,
Got a brass Eye,
Made an Example,
He’s Eat a Toad & half for Breakfast.
In his Element,

He’s Fishey,
Sore Footed,
Well in for’t,
Owes no Man a Farthing,
Fears no Man,
Crump Footed,
Been to France,
Froze his Mouth,
Been to a Funeral,
His Flag is out,
Spoke with his Friend,
Been at an Indian Feast.

He’s Glad,
Booz’d the Gage,
As Dizzy as a Goose,
Been before George,
Got the Gout,
Had a Kick in the Guts,
Been with Sir John Goa,
Been at Geneva,
Got the Glanders.

Half and Half,
Top Heavy,
Got by the Head,
Got on his little Hat,
Loose in the Hilts,
Knows not the way Home,
Got the Hornson,
Haunted with Evil Spirits,
Has Taken Hippocrates grand Elixir,

He’s Intoxicated,
Going to Jerusalem,
Been to Jerico,

He’s a King,
Clips the King’s English,
Seen the French King,
The King is his Cousin,
Got Kib’d Heels,
Het his Kettle.

He’s in Liquor,
He makes Indentures with his Leggs,
Well to Live,

He sees two Moons,
Seen a Flock of Moons,
Rais’d his Monuments,

He’s eat the Cocoa Nut,
Got the Night Mare,

He’s Oil’d,
Eat Opium,
Smelt of an Onion,

He drank till he gave up his Half-Penny,
Pidgeon Ey’d,
As good conditioned as a Puppy,
Has scalt his Head Pan,
Been among the Philistines,
In his Prosperity,
He’s been among the Philippians,
He’s contending with Pharaoh,
Wasted his Paunch,
He’s Polite,
Eat a Pudding Bagg,

He’s Quarrelsome,

He’s Rocky,
Lost his Rudder,
Been too free with Sir Richard,
Like a Rat in Trouble.

He’s Stitch’d,
In the Sudds,
Been in the Sun,
As Drunk as David’s Sow,
His Skin is full,
He’s Steady,
He’s Stiff,
He’s burnt his Shoulder,
He’s got his Top Gallant Sails out,
Seen the yellow Star,
As Stiff as a Ring-bolt,
Half Seas over,
His Shoe pinches him,
It is Star-light with him,
He carries too much Sail,
Been too free with Sir John Strawberry,
He’s right before the Wind with all his Studding Sails out,
Has Sold his Senses.

He’s Top’d,
Tipium Grove,
Double Tongu’d,
Topsy Turvey,
Has Swallow’d a Tavern Token,
He’s Thaw’d,
He’s in a Trance,
He’s Trammel’d,

He makes Virginia Fence,
Got the Indian Vapours,

The Malt is above the Water,
He’s Wise,
He’s Wet,
He’s been to the Salt Water,
He’s Water-soaken,
He’s very Weary,
Out of the Way.

The Phrases in this Dictionary are not (like most of our Terms of Art) borrow’d from Foreign Languages, neither are they collected from the Writings of the Learned in our own, but gather’d wholly from the modern Tavern-Conversation of Tiplers. I do not doubt but that there are many more in use; and I was even tempted to add a new one my self under the Letter B, to wit, Brutify’d: But upon Consideration, I fear’d being guilty of Injustice to the Brute Creation, if I represented Drunkenness as a beastly Vice, since, ’tis well-known, that the Brutes are in general a very sober sort of People

Bacon – It even goes with salad!

Who doesn’t love Bacon. The most versitile food. So good it even goes with salad.

Deboned Stuffed Chicken

The French culinary term for a deboned stuffed chicken is a Galantine or a Ballotine, with a Galantine usually served cold, but both can be with any type of meat, not just chicken. Being a French dish preperation it is no surprise that it is popular in the South of the USA with the Cajuns. However I’m not sure what the French would think about some of their stuffing choices such as crawfish or boudin.

I’ve been wanting to learn how to debone a whole chicken for quite a while now, but have never had enough time to research how to do it. However just this week, by accident, I came across a video by Jacques Pepin for how to create a boneless stuffed chicken. Compared to other videos I had seen in the past, he made it look very easy and with a minimum of cuts and wastage.

I had read that it was easier to learn with a standard sized chicken than a capon, but once mastered, the technique can be applied just as easily to a turkey or a quail. I started with a 5lb chicken and followed the instructions in the video. First I removed the wings and turned them into ‘chicken lollipops’, then with a small (very sharp) knife I removed the wishbone and cut the skin of the back.

Deboned Chicken - Done!

Deboned Chicken – Done!

So far, so good. I had the tablet set up on the counter to pause and rewind the video at the tricky bits, but I made sure that I completely dis-infected it afterwards since my hands were a bit ‘chickeny’. Next I removed the wing joints from the carcass and then just using my hands removed most of the carcass from the meat, before removing most of the leg bones, but using the back of a knife I broke the leg bone close to the end, to help prevent the skin retracting during cooking. I removed the fillets from the carcass and re-arranged the meat roughly back in the right places.

Stuffed Boneless Whole Chicken ready for the oven

Stuffed Boneless Whole Chicken ready for the oven

I had made a broccoli cheese stuffing earlier in the day. I laid this over the meat and stuffed some into the legs. Next came the lacing of the bird, which took a few goes to get it right.

I massaged some olive oil into the chicken skin before covering it in my own ‘grub’ rub mixture. It went into a 195C (380F) oven and while it was cooking I took the chicken carcass and bones and made a chicken stock. The cooking time was roughly 1hr 15mins and I checked that the stuffing was at least 75C (165F) before removing the chicken and letting rest for a few moments before serving.

Wow! I don’t think I will ever cook a standard roast chicken again. Though it took about 15mins to debone the chicken, I’m sure I can get this down to about 5mins in the future, but it was well worth it, as it was one of the tastiest and moistest chickens I’ve ever had and there was hardly any wastage.

Deboned Stuffed Chicken

Deboned Stuffed Chicken

Whole Deboned Chicken Recipe with Broccoli Stuffing


  • 2 cups of broccoli florets
  • 1 knob of butter
  • 2 tbs plain flour
  • 1.5 cups of milk
  • 4oz of grated Cheddar cheese
  • 1 cup of cooked white rice


Make a roux with the butter and flour. Once the flour has combined, add the milk and gently stir until it has thickened. Stir in the cheese until it has melted. Mix in the broccoli and rice. Pour the mixture into a oven proof dish and cook at 180C (355F) for about 25mins. Allow the mixture to cool and set aside in the refrigerator for later to stuff in to your deboned chicken as prepared above.

Smalec po Goralsku – Polish Bacon Pate

I made a visit to the Polish Deli yesterday to buy some ‘kiszka‘ (blood sausage), but more of that another time. While there I also got some duck pate and noticed ‘Smalec po Goralsku’, which was translated as Bacon Pate. I’m always looking for new edible delights to try and this fitted the bill.

Smalec po Goralsku - Polish Bacon Pate

Smalec po Goralsku – Polish Bacon Pate

Smalec is translated as lard, but this pate has big chucks of pork mixed in with it. I’m sure most people wouldn’t find the idea or the look of it appetising, but the creamy lard was just like a rich butter with the added bonus of bacon. It was prefect spread thickly on a crunchy brown baguette and I washed it down with an IPA, which helped cut through the pate nicely.

Bacon Pate spread on bread

Bacon Pate spread on bread

Lomo al trapo – Colombian New Year

We were invited to a Colombian New Year party this year, where the hosts, Angela & Fabian cooked a traditional Colombian dish called ‘Lomo al trapo‘, which literally translates as ‘beef tenderloin in cloth’.

Beef tenderloin wrapped in cloth

Beef tenderloin wrapped in cloth

Even though the temperature was a ‘balmy’ 70F outside there was a large wood fire burning ready for cooking the Lomo al trapo. The meat was marinated in wine, then it was placed on the leg of an old pair of jeans, more traditionally a dish towel is used. It was then covered in a thick layer of salt, wrapped up tightly with wire and then thrown on the red hot coals of the fire. The salt and the cloth form a protective crust to stop the steak for completely incinerating and helps seal in the juices and flavour of the meat.

Lomo al trapo cooking in fire

Lomo al trapo cooking in fire

Unfortunately there was a lot of smoke caused by the smouldering of the jeans, but when the steak was served, wow! The salty burnt crust, married with the juiciness was amazing. It was certainly one of the best steaks I’ve had and an impressive way of cooking it.

Lomo al trapo

Lomo al trapo

We were also introduced to other Colombian new year traditions. After the stroke of midnight we all had to take a bag (luggage) and run around the block, which is supposed to ensure travelling in the coming year. Also we had to eat twelve grapes and make a wish for each one.

Thanks again to Fabian and Angela for hosting a great party.

Lomo al Trapo Recipe


  • 1 whole beef tenderloin
  • 1 cup of beef stock
  • 3 minced garlic cloves
  • 1.5 cups of red wine
  • 1.5 cups sea salt
  • 1 large dish towel or a leg from an old pair of jeans
  • wire



  1. Trim any excess fat from the tenderloin.
  2. Mix 1 cup of wine with the beef stock and garlic. Pour this mixture over the beef and marinate in a refrigerator overnight.
  3. Light a wood fire and let burn, while feeding it for several hours.
  4. Spread the towel flat on a counter and cover it with a deep layer of the  salt. Place the beef on top of the salt and wrap very tightly with wire to secure.
  5. When the fire embers are red hot, place the wrapped beef in the embers
  6. After approx. 10 minutes, check the internal temperature with a meat thermometer and remove if it registers around 145F (63C).
  7. Remove the beef and unwrap it. Brush off any excess salt with red wine
  8. Slice and serve

Salt Crusted Beef Tenderloin

Many years later while living in Copenhagen, I was speaking to some of our neighbours about this fantastic way of prepare a whole filet of beef and they convinced me I should try it at our next communal barbecue get together. The recipe and preparation was slightly different as the one above, but the end result was equally good.

Salt Crusted Beef on the Grill

Salt Crusted Beef on the Grill

Colombian Salt Roasted Beef Resting

Colombian Salt Roasted Beef Resting


  • 1 whole beef filet
  • 1 cups of red wine
  • 2 cups of coarse salt
  • 2 tbsps of dried thyme
  • 1 large, clean sacrificial dishtowel or suitable cotton cloth
  • kitchen string



  1. Prepare the beef filet by removing any excess fat
  2. Heat the charcoal until white hot
  3. Soak the cloth in about a cup of red wine
  4. Cover the beef with the thyme all over
  5. Layout the cloth and cover evenly with the salt
  6. Place the beef in the middle of the salt and carefully wrap it in the cloth
  7. Tie the cloth together with the string
  8. Place the package onto the hot charcoal and rotate 180 degrees after about 6 mins
  9. Check the internal temperature after about 10 to 15 mins and remove from the coals after it reaches 145F (63C)
  10. Leave to rest for 6mins
  11. Cut into thick slices and serve
Salt Crusted Beef Tenderloin

Salt Crusted Beef Tenderloin